29 November 2015

late night rambles

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Life is a little hectic right now. I started a second job in October, and have been working 50-55 hours a week for the past month or so. In the entire month of November, I had one single day off. Somehow though, I'm still getting enough sleep every night and enough socializing with friends and family that I don't feel too overwhelmed. I actually think I'm sort of thriving from being this busy. I barely have enough time for meals and showering these days, which leaves very little time for me to over think things, which is probably good for me.

There are a lot of big changes coming in the next few months. A couple of friends and I have been toying with the idea of moving in together for a while now, and are planning to in the new year. We looked at a house today, and it made it all pretty real. 

I'm having a bit of a hard time growing up. I know it's time for me to claim my independence and move out on my own, but I'm struggling with the responsibility of it all. I'm stuck in the middle of a war between my head and my heart, and I'm having troubles committing to either side, or finding peace somewhere in the middle. My head says it's time for me to start thinking about my future, and that I should be preparing myself for school and moving out and growing up, but my heart is having a hard time letting go of my deepest desires of travelling the world and staying as young and free-spirited as I am now. 

I'm just trying to convince myself that the world will still be there to explore once I have a degree under my belt, but it's a hard pill to swallow.

Other than that, life is pretty good right now. A little confusing, a little hectic, but very, very good.